It's not about him or what he said, it's about how it made me feel. Still, I think it's best if we don't voice our assumptions about strangers based on their appearance. Let other people share their roles and labels with us. It's why I find it so powerful that people are declaring their pronouns these days. I'm trying to learn to default to "they," for example, unless I know for sure someone identifies as a "he" or "she."